We all know that it isn't a secret that I struggle with my weight. I am generally a happy person. I love to serve and be kind and see the positive in everyone. I love, love, love being a Mom. I love playing with my kids. I am not a person who worries about what people are thinking about me. I struggle with putting myself on the to do list. I am always thinking of everyone else. I don't know how to change that. I want to be healthy and look good but I don't desire to be perfect (110 pounds and a boob job). It isn't my number one priority so a lot of the time it gets put off. I don't care if I go to the store without makeup or in my pj's. I am weird I know. What does that say about me? I am not trying to make excuses for myself. I know I need to lose weight to be healthy. I just wish certain people would be more understanding that it isn't as easy for some people.
What is so frusterating is I can go a couple of months and eat really good, exercise and lose 10 pounds and then mess up one day and gain half of it back. I am serious too. It is hard to be perfect all the time. So this past 2 months I have lost and then gained a little and then lost and then gain a little. I am still down 10 pounds as of right now but I am so frusterated. It is like a lose, lose battle for me. I have been journaling what I eat and trying to fit exercising in. I am not about to quit either. I am just letting you all know that I will get healthy!!!! I am determined. I won't quit no matter what anyone says to me. I am doing this for me. I know I could do better and I am going to strive to do my best this week. I went to Zumba this morning and went for a walk but the negative words drag me down. I can't get it out of my head. I really just want to be loved for being me and not what I look like. Everyone has their struggles in life, for me, it is my weight. I know that I will always have to work out and watch what I eat. See..... I already feel better just by writing this.
To post or not to post...... that is the question.
10 comments:
Leish, I'm sorry you're having a bad day. Just try to think positive, you are a good person, you are a good mom...we all struggle with our self image and wish we could look like that other person. Just remember who you are, that is far more important.
Aleisha, hang in there !! It will be OK. You can only do your best. NO ONE is perfect ! I think you are great. You make me want to do better. You have wonderful kids and friends that love you. I hope you start to feel better soon. You deserve to be happy and have POSITIVE things said to you. Negative comments do not help anyone. Good luck, I hope tomorrow is a better day !
It is so good to vent and let out your frustrations. You are doing an amazing job and you are absolutely right about being able to be loved for you and not your weight. NO ONE deserves negative words no matter what the situation is!!!!
I have loved you since the firsti time I met. You have the sweetest and kindest personality and I love friends like you. I like to hang out at the stores in my PJ's too. So just so you know I think you're beautiful inside and out and I know that some day you will be where you want to be.
Oh Leish...I think you are doing great and just take it one day at a time. I know how you feel. If you mess up one day, jsut tell yourself tomorrow is a new day. And just try hard not to think what anyone says. If they knew the real story they wouldn't say anything. You are a great mom and you are putting everything in front of you. One day you will have time for you!
Way to get your feelings out, I know it always helps me out a little. As far as your post goes...everyone is right...looks do NOT define a person. I think you are such a great person that anyone would be crazy to say something rude. It is hard to look past negative comments, but hang in there.
I'm sorry you have been having a hard time. You are an awesome and beautiful person!!! I think you are doing GREAT! ALWAYS remember that we love you!
I think you are awesome and always happy. I know that it's very hard to forget what people say, but try your best. It's worth it, don't give up. You inspire me.
Oh, Leish, I am so sorry. Sounds like me. I am so busy with kids and am an up-beat person, but then I catch my reflection and I think, "crap, I gotto get some me time" or "I probly should of not worn my Jamees( I love my PJ's!!). I finally went into my fam doc and after some blood work, it turns out I have a mild hypothyroid problem. So a thyroid pill a day, and it seems way easier to see results when I work out...."when" I do. But the weight seems to stay off and it has helped my mood too.
Hey don't give up just take one step at a time. Well maybe take two steps at a time. That way you are getting more exercise.
You will make it.
Love you sooooooooooo much.
I love all your posts. I just can't seem to get at it.....I already spend so much time at the computer.
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